2015. What a year! It’s safe to say that this has been yet
another rollercoaster of a year in my life. But as we enter the final few days,
I know that I’ve made the right decisions.
As I think you’re all aware, I’ve said goodbye to some
people (and vehicles) this year. Had you have asked me last year if I could
ever do that, I’d have said you were crazy. This year has made me realise just
how fast things can change. We have the ability to shape and change our lives
with the decisions we make, but sometimes life takes charge and captains your
life in the direction in which you are probably too scared to sail. Have you
ever had an outer body experience in which someone asks you life-defining and
life-changing questions and somehow, from somewhere, you’re giving the most
honest and heart-breaking answers without a moment’s thought. I have. I turned
my life upside down that day and I don’t think I’ll forget it very easily.
Only hours earlier, I had somebody, who had previously been
fairly closed about their romantic intentions, offer me all I’d ever wanted in
a single breath. “It doesn’t have to be a dream”. For years, I’d been unsure
about myself and I had done whatever was necessary to keep it under wraps and
be the person everybody expected. But with one sentence, somebody offered a “get
out of jail free” card, a one-way ticket to freedom, a way to be me. With that,
I embarked on some of the most painful but liberating few months of my life. But
I had her by my side the whole time. Lau has been my crutch through every
decision I’ve had to make, and she’s also been the person I’ve shared the best
times with.
I don’t care what people say when they see us. Lau knows I
enjoy winding people up when we catch them staring. I think the best two were a
young guy and girl who watched us dancing in Flares, the entire time open
mouthed. I’d like to point out, we were horrifically Dad-dancing to Cyndi
Lauper, but perhaps it was the age gap, perhaps it was the fact we’re two
girls. Either way, their reactions were pretty hilarious! I’ve come down from
my pedestal this year. I used to sneer at age gaps but now I realise that it was
pure ignorance. Lau reckons we work because I’m mature for my age. I reckon it’s
because she is such a child! Maybe we meet half way? I’ve learned not to judge
from what you see. People can be incredibly happy together – who cares if it’s
not a coupling that would make the front page of “Vogue”?
I’ve met some lovely people through the PGCE too. Maybe it’s
because we’re that little bit older now, or maybe because the course is just so damn
hard. But the people I’m studying with are so down to earth and somehow make me
laugh when sometimes I want to cry. Huddling around a cold table in the SU
telling our horror stories from the previous week and crying with laughter at
the punchlines of the tales has become my favourite way to spend a Monday. It’s
refreshing to be around people who can so openly admit flaws and failures and
can laugh about them. There’s little time for judgements or prejudice. I no
longer feel under constant speculation because I don’t want to go out drinking
or partying until silly o’clock. Some of us bond over wearing the same Primark
cardigan and nobody mentions the importance of Hollister or who has spent the
most money on their expensive jeans. The offer of going for a coffee instead of the pub is
such a welcome notion. A world away from the freshers and undergrads, I finally
feel at home!
I could rattle on all day about what a year it has been, but
for those of you who care and are still reading, here’s a little break down of
a rollercoaster year:
January 2015 – Aim and I went to Disneyland Paris after a
little bit of cultural tourism around the city first, naturally. She managed to
get me onto a rollercoaster that does a loop-the-loop which I then requested we
go on another nine times…
March 2015 – Jen and I went to Amsterdam for a dance
audition (her, not me) and enjoyed a lovely little European weekend away!
March 2015 – St Patrick’s Day specifically. Lau and I
started to get to know each other a little more with the help of the Creigiau Inn.
May 2015 – The month of coming out the cupboard!
June 2015 – I bought my first car! A little black KA called
Mickey. Unfortunately, I crashed him in September…
July 2015 – My Disney Princess birthday party haha!
August 2015 – Pride Cymru. Lau and I went to Pride in
Cardiff and were part of the march. We were actually on TV ;) oh yeah!
August 2015 – Le Touquet. Lau and I went to France for a
little getaway. It was lush! The weather was stunning, the resort was charming
and we really found our feet!
August 2015 – We moved to our new house in Porth!
September 2015 – I embarked on my PGCE Secondary MFL. I’m
currently teaching French and Italian in a Secondary School near Blackwood.
After a scrambled month last year in which I worked for BMW for half a day and
other crazy ideas, I finally realised what I’m meant to do with my life. I love
teaching!
October 2015 - With a little help, I threw my big sister a surprise 30th birthday party! Success!
October 2015 – My Dad came to visit and we had lots of crazy
adventures including climbing Pen-y-Fan.
December 2015 – Mine and Lau’s first Christmas together. My
first Christmas with my sister and the kids! Magic!
Everything changed. But as the dust settles, I have a
girlfriend who I love and who loves me. We have a nice (albeit temporarily
scaffolded) house to live in. We have just had a modest yet magical Christmas
spent with family and friends. We now look forward to the next year together,
anxiously excited to see what adventures and rollercoasters await in 2016.
